The first month is equally important for both the baby and the mother. The baby has just arrived, but the mother has gone through her own rebirth and needs as much care as the child. Whether you are breastfeeding or formula feeding, you are still the baby’s anchor. That’s why family and friends must focus on her well-being, ensuring she gets not only meals but also rest, recovery, and emotional support. Expect a predictable cycle: feed, sleep, poop, repeat. Newborns feed every few hours, often on demand. I did set alarms to track feeding times, but babies will tell you themselves through their cries.

These days can feel exhausting, as rest comes in small stretches. The best approach is to sleep when your baby sleeps and allow your support system (if you have) to handle everything else. Remember, when the mother is cared for, the baby is cared for too.

Care for the Mother

A mother running on empty cannot give her best to her child. You will lose patience, break down, and sometimes feel lost, and that’s okay. There is no such thing as a perfect mother. Remember, rest isn’t selfish, it’s survival. 

Too often, women say, ‘I haven’t slept in years since my child was born; I have no peace.’ But allowing yourself rest in the early days prevents a lifetime of regret. Remember, you chose this child, and it’s not a favor to them. Yes, motherhood comes with struggle, but it also brings a lifetime of joy. Caring for yourself is the first step to fully embracing that happiness.”

Birth, whether natural or C-section, demands healing. Stitches, pelvic floor recovery, fatigue, it all takes time. Give yourself at least 6 weeks to recover, regulate your hormones, and bond with your baby without worrying about household chores.

• Choose soft, loose clothes like cotton gowns. Avoid anything that puts pressure on stitches or your waist.
• Don’t rush. Get up slowly, take short walks indoors, and avoid loud noises or sudden strain.
• Limit visitors at first, as your body is prone to infection. Sleep whenever you can, your body needs it more than you know it. Light reading can help if you want a distraction.
• Hygiene is key. My doctor asked me to shower the day after my C-section and it helped. Check with your doctor before you do anything.
• Beyond traditional sweet laddus and mixtures, focus on real, nutrient-rich food: protein, carbs, iron, calcium, fibre, omega-3s, and plenty of water. Breast milk is 88% water, hydration is non-negotiable. 

Care for the Baby

In the beginning, your baby’s only language is crying. It’s confusing, you’ll wonder if they’re hungry, wet, gassy, or just uncomfortable. With time, you’ll start to recognize the difference.

Society often judges mothers harshly: ‘How can she not know why her baby is crying?’ or ‘Babies are always calm with their mothers.’These comments cut deep, but the truth is, every mother struggles in the early days. People hide their own difficult experiences out of pride or fear of seeming inadequate, leaving new mothers to feel isolated.

The reality is, you will feel things society says you shouldn’t like anger, exhaustion, irritation, even resentment. But feeling them doesn’t make you less of a mother; it makes you human. Only when you allow yourself to acknowledge these emotions can you learn to manage them, so that when your baby needs your patience and calm, you have the strength to give it. 

Of course, your little one is too young to understand any of this. What they need most right now is simple, gentle care—and here’s how you can give it

• Feed: My son breastfed every 1.5–2 hours and slept most of the day. I can’t speak for formula feeding, but whatever the method, babies feed often.
• Burp: Always burp your baby after each feed. A proper burp is usually loud. Early on, I mistook soft sounds for burps, but soon realized he wasn’t burping well, leading to colic. Once I got it right, things eased a bit. Gas is often the reason babies struggle to sleep.
• Holding: Newborns are fragile. Hold them with support, especially during feeding. If you’re unsure, ask your doctor or elders for guidance. Poor posture during breastfeeding can cause lasting back pain for mothers.
• Bath: In the first days, a gentle wipe with lukewarm water is enough avoiding the naval/cord area. Later, consult your doctor about baths, 2–3 times a week is fine. Use a baby tub if possible, and always take help, as babies are delicate.
• Massage: Wait until the cord falls off naturally, never try to speed it up. Once it does, you can begin gentle massages with coconut or olive oil (check with your doctor first; mine advised against ghee). Massage isn’t always about strength it’s about touch, bonding, and helping your baby’s body move. Keep the room warm, and bathe your baby soon after with slightly warm (never hot) water. Remember, baby skin is delicate, no “red skin” baths.
• Skin-to-Skin: This is often underrated, but I loved it. Holding your baby close to your skin has incredible benefits it boosts milk supply, signals your body that your baby needs you, strengthens their immunity, and most beautifully, deepens your bond.
• Play: Even at this stage, babies begin recognizing faces and voices. Talk, sing, and show them toys with bright colors and textures. It’s as much about bonding as stimulation.
• Clothes: Dress your baby only in soft cotton or muslin. Their skin is delicate and easily irritated, so avoid anything rough or fancy, those can wait. Change clothes right away if they get even slightly wet from spit-up. 
• Poop: Keep track of your baby’s poop and pee. Doctors often ask about it to check hydration and feeding.
• Interaction with Others: As tempting as it is, do not let anyone kiss your baby, not even family. It’s one of the leading causes of infections in newborns today. The kindest thing visitors can do is admire from a distance without risking the baby’s health.

Milestones

• Closes fists and curls toes when touched
• Startles at sudden sounds or movements
• Turns toward the breast or bottle to feed
• May respond to familiar voices
• Notices faces
• Lifts head briefly during tummy time

Sleep & Naps

• 14–17 hours in a day
• 4–5 daytime naps
• Breastfed babies may wake more often to feed

Diaper Care

• Expect 4–6 wet diapers daily
• Change promptly to avoid rashes
• Clean with wipes or lukewarm water and cotton
• Apply gentle moisturizer to prevent dryness

Playtime

• Offer toys with bright colors and varied textures
• Clap hands softly to catch attention
• Supervised tummy time strengthens muscles and eases gas
• Gently cycle their legs to encourage movement
• They may coo or make small sounds while playing

The reason I write is simple: there are far too many myths around newborn care, and we follow them blindly, even with so much information at our fingertips. Often, it isn’t because we don’t care, but because we don’t bother to cross-check what others suggest. Questioning advice doesn’t mean you’re being disrespectful. It means you care enough about your child to make sure what you’re doing is safe. Blindly following, on the other hand, isn’t respect, it’s ignorance at the cost of your baby’s well-being.

Common Myths About Newborns

Feeding schedule : Feed on demand, every 2–3 hours.

Water: Not needed before six months; milk provides hydration.

Honey: Never risk of botulism.

Kajal/Surma: Can irritate eyes; avoid.

Cuddling spoils: Babies need touch; it builds security and bonding.

Daily baths: Not necessary; sponge baths or diaper-area cleaning suffice.

Hot Bath water: Warm, never hot. Test with your elbow.

Mother’s routine: Changing it won’t make the baby sick.

Wet hair/feeding after shower: No risk of colds.

Direct sunlight for Baby: Avoid, use indirect sunlight if needed.

Here are some tips I received from my hospital on how to boost Breast Milk:

Helpful foods: Fennel, cumin seed water, garlic, and leafy greens can naturally support milk supply.

Feed often: The more you breastfeed, the more your body produces milk. Our bodies are truly amazing.

Offer both breasts: Alternate at each feeding to stimulate production.

Gentle massage: Massage your breasts while the baby is nursing to help milk flow.

Eat nutritious meals: Focus on protein-rich, wholesome foods.

Stay hydrated: Drink plenty of water.

Rest: Sleep supports milk production.

Water: Drink a glass of water before every feed

You may hear comments like, “You don’t have enough milk” or “My baby used to sleep for hours after feeding.” Often, these come from someone’s own insecurity rather than truth. Don’t let such remarks make you doubt yourself—just ignore them. Every mother’s body is designed to produce enough milk for her baby, though it may take a few days to adjust. And if you need to use formula, remember there’s no shame in that—feeding your baby is what matters most.

What you should really focus on are the signs that show your baby is well-fed: wet diapers, healthy poop, and reassurance from your doctor. That’s the true measure, not what others say.

And yes, there will be moments when you feel like crying. In those times, just remember—every feed is an act of love. Nursing isn’t just about milk; it’s how you and your baby connect in the most beautiful, unspoken way. Every mother and baby is unique. Use this only as awareness, always check with your doctor for guidance. Month one may feel chaotic, but it’s also beautifully unforgettable. The first month is all about closeness. Your baby doesn’t need the world right now, just you, their mother.

Happy Motherhood! 🌸

Useful Link

New born care: https://www.who.int/tools/your-life-your-health/life-phase/newborns-and-children-under-5-years/caring-for-newborns

Feeding: https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/infant-and-young-child-feeding

Read Next: Month 3: Love, Play & Sleep Regression →

Month 2: Feed, Sleep, Play, Repeat –>